Priorities out of whack

So here I am at work stressing my ass off; wondering what form of corporate BS will be thrown my way next. I'm losing sleep over it, my kids and Kelly are worried about my health, and even my friends are noticing a change in my mood.

I last went through this in August, 2009. Anyone who remembers then knows I had a nervous breakdown. The only thing that pulled me out of it was a trip to see my brother-in-law and a realization that life is too short for the BS.

Now, I'm in a bigger position with more responsibility. I am once again on a downward spiral of constant melancholy. I need to find a way to re-center my thoughts and priorities while not letting the corporate crap bother me to the point of effecting my life. I need to do some kind of time management with flowcharts so I can do my job well (Which I already do) and not have my home life be effected. I guess I need more structure for myself so I don't drive myself in a panic.

The corporate BS is everywhere but I'm trying to say forget it all and let my hard work do my talking for me.

Until I reach that point, I hope my family and friends understand that it's not them making me this way and can find a way to forgive me for my mood change. I'm going to get better. It's just a question of how to do it.

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A short story

During my trek through the tall grasslands of Iceland, I encountered a bucktooth hamster while jogging down the half broken interstate known as Highway 108 Southwest, at first I thought he had hostile intentions until he offered me a joint of imported Mexican marijuana, I gladly accepted this kind gesture, as I just assumed that he was going to offer me a few hits, then move along his daily business.

After taking my first hit, we talked about the weather, and other small talk. Within a few minutes, the joint extinguished prematurely; unfortunately the hamster, which I just found out his name is Ryan, didn't have a lighter, so he tracked down a helpless acorn, rubbed it against his bicuspid which caused the tip of the acorn to ignite, thus enabling me to re-light my joint which still had a good 8 hits left in it, not counting the roach hits. In between hits, Ryan informed me that he recently been apprehended by the coyote police while he was sodomizing a goldfish, even though the act was consensual for both parties; apparently he was arrested while licking red wine off the fins of the goldfish, the charge was underage drinking because apparently the legal drinking age for rodents is 47, and Ryan was only 33.

After serving his 6 month sentence, which in human terms is 3 days, he made a short trip to Ethiopia where he met, and married a stripper white panther that took a vow of celibacy, but was open to giving a 2 inch dildo a hand job. After they eloped, he was riding in his leaf mobile when he was pulled over for doing 10 inches per hour in a 5 inch per hour zone. He was given a speeding ticket, after which he dropped off his wife to their cave, and while he was hunting for ant farms to feed the corpse of his mother that was sitting in the house, he encountered me, and here we are.

I found this story to be fascinating, and partially amusing, however as I was taking the last hit of the joint, I looked up and noticed a cryptic smile was on Ryan's face, at this point I realized that I was in fact smoking a joint of sodium-penethol laced with a date rape drug. While I was losing conscientiousness, I began developing an erection, and noticed Ryan laughing hysterically in an evil tone.

When I regained conscienceness, I found myself bound to a bed of twigs, and a wig of caterpillars had been placed on my head. Soon after I was joined by a Blue Jay wearing a short skirt that was carrying a bottle of lubricating jelly. As I was struggling to break free from this apparent asylum, the unnamed Blue Jay lubed my left nostril while pecking at my aureole, she eventually straddled my nostril and began moaning profusely, during which I found it to be a strangely euphoric experience. During my orgasm, I managed to break free from the binds that were made up of goats hooves. The Blue Jay hadn't cum yet, so she attempted to pluck out my eyes, but before any severe damage had been done, I slashed her throat with a broken end of the hoof.

Once out of the room, I realized I was in a tree house, so I made a quick effort to exit the premises; unfortunately, once I stepped out of the hole, I fell 37 stories, and broke my neck. While I was fading into death, I saw Ryan sucking my dick while being ass fucked by his wife; during the last minute I had a first time thing, an orgasm from my ass. Then I passed away.

Moral of the story? Never travel to a grassland in a place that's supposed to be covered in ice.

The start of the random

When the tongue sucking, cum filled dragon attempted to confiscate my baked beans, I threw a gob of snot infested loogies at her which caused her to faint; thereby causing my aids infested genetils to pulsate into a frenzy as I masturbated on her unconscience body, envisioning I was walking an anti-donut parade.

Literature driven trees flying through the open birth canal really make a sobering cigarette filter due to the highly concentrated hamburger juice flowing through their blistered veins. 5 pounds to chocolate SUV inside the waxed buffer ding dong. Hysterectomy gasoline guzzlers ride hairy stock market exchangers flu embedded weasel turds with the santiation loaf of bread in the toothpaste of a leg spread newspaper.

While masturbating with chocloate flavored lotion during a bowel movement is a very great, and erotic experience; I am still a sucker for a classic blow job while getting thumbed in my ass.