Can my astral relaxation have altered my attitude?

I went to Missouri 2 1/2 weeks ago. During this time I vowed 3 things:
1: To relax my stress level from all the crap that work and the crap my mom has been pulling the last few years.
2: To cut back on my medication intake
3: To re-attune my astral abilities, and find my center that I seem to have lost some time ago.

I think I accomplished those 3 things rather well in the short time that I had to do so. The problem lies in that now, that I am back in the full swing of my "Normal", every day life, I seem to have developed, what some would say an "Attitude problem". Kelly would be one of the primary advocates to this statement being a truth.

Let's see why I would have this apparent problem of having an "Attitude problem".

I think some of it may have to do with the fact that while I was relaxing in my mind and realizing how trivial a lot of things i've stressed myself so much about over the last 3 years has been, I also realized how formulaic my life is beginning to become. This is a common problem and thing that happens with a lot of people; especially those in their 30's who have a family to support and a career that they are working on. They're trying to find their place in what we call society.

I happen to be doing just that. I'm 31 years old. Father of 2, happily married for 11 years and have a job that pays me $47k per year. I bought my first house 14 months ago. I now own a new car; which now has a car payment, and am just living smack-dab in the middle of the "Working-Class" lifestyle.

"Lifestyle" is a word I detest, but I digress that for this post, as I can easily go on a 3 hour diatribe about that on another blog post in the future.

So, now that I have established that I am what the government would consider a normal tax-paying citizen of the working world; I am starting to see that my life consists of the same things over and over.

My routine goes something like this: (A reminder that this is not necessarily a bad thing, just my pointing out that while even though it isn't bad, it can get boring from time to time; if nothing else, for lack of variety in such a dynamic world)
- I get up around 5am Monday through Thursday, take a shower, then drive 35 minutes to work.
- Once I arrive at work, I spend the first part of my day reading through e-mails; seeing what corporate bullshit will be thrown my way during the first part of my day.
- I then proceed to do my usual beginning of the day "Manager duties".
- After doing my beginning duties, I focus on doing the projects that are either required of me, or I find projects I feel will benefit my standing in the company as well as increase consumer satisfaction. Doesn't always work, but I do the best I can.
- No need to bore you with the rest of my work day. It goes along the lines of more corporate BS e-mails, and a bunch of other crap I have to do. That's beside the point.
- I always try and get home before my son gets out of school, but it usually doesn't happen, or sometimes i'll get home beforehand.
- I take a nap within 45 minutes of being home because i'm not a morning person, and being thrown so many corporate things wears me out mentally.
- Once I wake up some 2, or 3 hours later. I hang out with my 2 sons by talking with them, sometimes playing games.
- I load up a video game (Lately it's been World of Warcraft). Kelly and I play that together through the majority of the night.
- During my play time of this, I check my Facebook, my Twitter accounts and my blogs. I also do approximately 3 paragraphs a night of a paper/article/blog post I want to write.
- I go to bed around 11:30pm and then the routine starts over again

As I said earlier, this isn't a bad thing, it's just sometimes a little too formulaic for my tastes; as, although I detest changes (Major ones, to be exact) in my life; I do like a slight bit of diversity.

I think this is where a majority of my discontent comes in. I need to find fresher, and more things to do during my day. Not just at work, but at home afterward is well.

It seems every time I do try and do something new; such as taking the family out to a place, things get chaotic because usually my youngest gets irritable and wanting to wander off to places we don't want him to go, and myself or Kelly get very agitated; thus that ruins the good time i'm trying to have with them. It's no ones fault. It is pure happenstance.

I do know, however that I do, and have been getting aggravated that I falling in to this rift of the "Same ol' song and dance". It's a formula, that while not bad, does beg for change.

It reminds me of the movie "Groundhog Day". Bill Murray lives the same day over and over for years. They never explain why, but my take from that movie is that it shows how people take their lives for granite so much and live the same lives over and over every single day that they get out of bed. I do not want to become one of those people, so naturally being the outspoken person that I am, when I sense something going on in my life that I either don't like or something I feel needs a "Shake up", I begin to act distressed and frustrated without warning or reason.

This is not singled out to any one single person, but just the idea of moving a long at on a straight train track is beginning to wear on me. Consequently, I seem to "Blow up" over the stupidest crap, like not being able to set up a new TV immediately after buying it.

I need to add diversity to my life so I am not becoming one of the many mindless "Drones" that I see every single day of my life. I hate those kind of people and would hate to see myself turn into something I hate.

This is more proof, also that I can write my thoughts of what's bothering me, but can't seem to convey it in vocal terms. I really need to work on that. All I can say is the moral of my point here is that even though I act like a "10-year old child" with my snappy attitude, it's not without reason, and I also know that people aren't mind readers, but it would sometimes make it easier if people could read my auras and my body chemistry a little better to know what is bothering me, or, if nothing else, know that I am plagued by something that is going on in my life.

Here's hoping that I do find this "Change" that I am dying to find. Even if it's just a small adjustment, for all I know it could be all I need to remain fresh with my mind.

Lucian, the impath?

So i've been one to read the auras and energies of my children as they have advanced in their years. It's no secret to anyone who knows my beliefs that I know that all children start with all their senses available to them, as well as full functionality of their brains. Eventually, they begin to lose these abilities as they adapt to the world they live in and the lifestyle that is presented to them. Some keep a few of their "Unnatural" abilities while most just adopt fully to the culture of the civilization they live in. Hence the reason they say only 10% of the brains function is known. It's obvious to me that they have not taken notice of the brain waves of children ages 3 and younger.

My oldest son, Meria, who is now 10, had wonderful abilities and talents that gave him the power to see auras, parallel people and even communicate with people of other planes. He lost most of these abilities when he reached the age of 6 and school brought him to the every day life customs we're all used to being in. He still has a few of the senses left to him, and he also happens to be one of the oldest souls I have ever met.

My youngest son, Lucian however, who is 5, has not lost any of his abilities. It is fascinating and intimidating to watch. I have always known that he was special in his ability to read people, discover their emotions, their inner thoughts and communicate with them through body language and parallel linking. Tonight, though proved my point that he is without a doubt, one of the most "In touch" people I have met in a very long time.

My mother complains that he has trouble seeing things unless they are close to him, and needs eye surgery. While this may be true, it is apparent to me that it is highly exaggerated. I'm sitting in my bathroom tonight smoking a cigarette and all the lights were completely out. He decided to join me in there because he isn't feeling too well and wanted to be close to his dad. During this time, he was sitting on the opposite side of the bathroom from where I was sitting; approximately 6 feet away. Remind you, this room was covered in total darkness, only had a small pale of moonlight in the upper corners of the room. When Kelly was getting ready to come in to the room to bring me a drink, I covered my eyes to prevent the light from irritating my eyes. Lucian, out of nowhere asked me "Dad, why are you covering your eyes?". I was completely floored by this question, as the room was still in complete darkness and I was sitting a relatively good distance from him; yet he was able to see a small facial gesture that I had made. During this time, I, who also have good vision in the dark, began to read his aura like I do on a daily basis, and it was a color that I had never seen on him before. It was almost as if it was emitting a out of body aura that I didn't think he had experienced yet. I haven't shown him any of the paths that I have taken to get to the point where I am at. It was an engrossing feeling I had; watching him utilize powers that I knew he always had, but I feared he was close to losing because he is on the verge of being domesticated.

To further my amazing experience with my son, a few minutes later, he told me and Kelly of a dream he had last night about mom driving our truck and getting into an accident, thus wrecking the truck. The reason I found this so flooring was as Kelly was leaving for work today, Lucian got up and gave Kelly a big hug and kiss and told her to be careful. Not even 20 minutes later, while Kelly was driving, she hit a patch of black ice. It caused her to do a 540 degree spin in the middle of the highway. Thankfully, she avoided hitting any cars, regained her barrings and proceeded with her day.

So, with this in mind; tell me: Is there any doubt that Lucian did not see this event happening in his sub conscience and helped Kelly prevent from being in a potentially disastrous accident? I would say yes.

I find this so awesome, that my youngest son hasn't been fully domesticated to the average human lifestyle and is still using abilities that he was born with. I do plan on helping him harness these further so that he never loses them.

Needless to say, it was quite an interesting experience today with him. Dad loves you, Lu. Thanks for being you.